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About mike249

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  • Birthday 09/10/1976

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  • Gender Male
  • Location North Carolina
  • Interests Reading, golf and challenging conversation.
  1. Was my wife Catholic when I married her? My wife has always considered herself a Catholic in large part because her parents are Catholic. She held this belief without knowledge of its implications. She accepted the idea as a type of inheritance. More recently, she has actively devoted herself to the practice of this religion. This began in earnest when she entered into AAs Twelve Step program as a remedy to her drinking problem. I also had a drinking problem and ran from the program of AA once I realized what it was about. I made the choice to substitute an irrational lifestyle in favor of consciousness. She has substituted one irrational lifestyle for another. This represents the nature of my dilema.
  2. Ayn Rand said the following: "When one deals with irrational persons, where argument is futile, a mere “I don’t agree with you” is sufficient to negate any implication of moral sanction. When one deals with better people, a full statement of one’s views may be morally required. But in no case and in no situation may one permit one’s own values to be attacked or denounced, and keep silent." This issue has taken center stage for me as of late. It's to the point that I may be required to dissolve an 11 year marriage because I cannot permit myself to be held any longer by guilt. My wife is a Catholic. By staying with her I feel as if I am sanctioning evil through association. In many ways I relate to the character Hank Reardon. However, I have a difficult time leaving my daughter in the custody of this woman. I am in the military and by the very nature of my job will stand little chance of winning custody in court. With close aquaintances I speak my mind always. Sometimes I initiate the conversation. It's of no consequence to me whether they agree or not. I only know one man I can rightfully call a friend. My differences with him involve his lack of knowledge not lack of reason. I consider him a competent man and just recently he took me up on my reading suggestions.
  3. It wasn't more than two years ago that I was drinking heavily to the point that I would be considered an alcoholic according to most definitions. As a result of my drinking certain events came about that convinced me to give Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) a try. So I did. What I found attractive about the program, at least initially, were the stories I heard from other alcoholics. I could identify. It was easy to find commonalities in the stories told by others. I think a lot of AA newcomers are drawn by this. Additionally, people are friendly and understanding. They rally around the newcomer. They promise solutions. They give you a list of phone numbers and encourage you to call them if you feel like you are going to drink. They will also tell you to, "Keep coming back!." A person, half in a daze and very much vulnerable to such influence, can easily get sucked into the 12 step program. It is my belief that AA plays no role in whether an individual quits drinking permanently. The motivation to quit drinking is already present in the individual that makes the conscious decision to attend their first meeting. In fact, I would argue that over time AA may actually play a role in encouraging people to drink again. Let me explain. AA's bible, The Big Book, encourages the reader to rely less on reason and more on faith. Over-reliance on reason had been part of the problem, we are told. Each individual is encouraged to find a "God of their understanding." Once this is complete, and you have submitted yourself to the blind worship of some supernatural entity you are asked to confess all of your wrongs and shortcomings to your sponsor. You are expected to do this everyday for the rest of your life. Self-esteem doesn't stand a chance in such an environment. It's for these reasons that I believe AA actually encourages individuals back into the grips of their alcoholic addiction. I realized this early on an ran as fast as I could the other way. I could ramble on indefinitely about this topic. I'll let it rest here.