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Everything posted by Red

  1. It's Election Day!

    Between 1932 and 2006 in sweden we had a totalt of 10 years that were not ruled by the Social Democratic Party. Between 1991-1994 the "right wing" opposition came to power with prime minister Carl Bildt. As I have understood it times were not exactly great, and our "right wing" opposition here is merely a lighter version of the socialist party. So, anyway, they set out to clean up the dirt, best as they could I suppose... In 1994 the socialists took over again, by pointing at the mess they themselves had created. In -06 a few people were still pointing at the mess over 10 years ago - "remember last time the right wing parties ruled"? It doesnt matter that the Social Democrats have messed up more times than anyone can count. What matters is the fear that they have created of the opposition messing things up and destroying the great welfare that has taken the social democrats so long to build up. In a similar fashion I think Bush will be blamed for a very long time. There is, after all, a huge financial mess that he is getting blamed for. Here Obama can step in and "save" america from the bad republicans, he can "fix" the mess and "build up" the country and "create" more "welfare". Another interesting thing to note regarding swedish politics is also that the last election the Social Democrats lost to the opposition. The opposition won by adopting the same rhetoric and the same policies as the Social Democrats, they only made it slightly better. I think you are going to see the same thing in America. The Democrats are likely to stay in power for a long time and to win the republicans will feel the need to compromise more and more. The good news is, this can be a great time to spread Objetivism.
  2. Happy Birthday to B. Royce

    Happy Birthday!
  3. Happy Birthday to Red

    Haha, that's a nice one Mr. Royce - I like it! Thank you!
  4. This must mean that my standards are set just about right. She has also studied architecture btw. Seems like she's got brains too.
  5. Happy Birthday to Red

    Thanks! I had a wonderfull day. The fall has come so it's been dark and rainy for the past weeks, but yesterday there were clear blue skies and sunshine - sunshine just happens to be one of the things I love the most.
  6. I must say you have very good taste... Morena Baccarin is just... wow! The one who comes closest to my ideals though is Ashiwarya Rai, especially in this picture: Just look at those eyes!
  7. Objectivist Dropouts

    I loved Zorro too! However, I think only watched the new series from the early 90's. There was not only Zorro, but also the lovely Patrice Martinez who played Victoria - she was just so beautiful. Other heroes I had were Charlton Heston(don't know how many times i've seen Ben Hur), The Three Musketeers(first real book I ever read) and characters like Aragorn and Gandalf from The Lord of the Rings. Then there were less obvious ones like Hercule Poirot and the Marlboro man(though I never liked smoking). I think I know what that attraction comes from. Remember how evil is hating the good for being good? Well, what about loving the good for being good?
  8. Objectivist Dropouts

    I think that weird feeling is a healthy sign. If i look at myself I first found Objectivism when I was 16, and I think I read Atlas when I was 17 or 18. So it's about 10 years since that first introduction. And you know, looking back at when I was a teenager sure feels a bit weird. Some things I can be proud of and others i'd rather forget(like my horrid fashion sense ). But you know, that just shows that a lot of things have happened since. I actually don't even have to look that far back at all, the last few years is enough, and I think that's absolutely fantastic. It's just growth and development, and what would life be without it? And see, if I was not like that back then I would not be who I am today. Regarding the reasons for being drawn to Objectivism I think it's good to recognize the good ones too. I have given it some thought and found something that could be interesting - perhaps you can relate to the same thing. I have always valued truth, honesty and justice. Now I bet that's something everyone here can relate to in some way, but... have you thought about what made you choose that in the first place? For me the most fundamental aspect has always been that I want to lead a good life, and by trying to figure out what good means all else has followed.
  9. Objectivist Dropouts

    I think this is quite common and not strange at all. Whatever philosophy one had before finding Objectivism it must have had some psychological effects. So in a way you are not only throwing out the bad philosophy but there's also a bad psychology to take care of. This also makes it possible to discover Objectivism for all the wrong reasons but stay with the philosophy for all the right reasons. Somewhere along the road it's just a choice of either evading or being honest. Evaders are the ones who drop out because they never resolve their issues. Honest people eventually(because it will take time) recognize their mistakes, however stupid or messed up they might be, and fix them. --- Regarding the different categories for drop-outs i'd like to add one: The infiltrator I don't know if these people really are interested in the philosophy to begin with, maybe some are, but what they find is not what they expected. What i'm reffering to here are often very intelligent people who quickly grasp the philosophy, and soon they are looking at themselves in a mirror(which shows the darkest depths of their own psychology). This person sees exactly what he is and he does not like it, but what he truly hates is the fact that the philosophy allows others to also see it. That's why his motivation is destruction. Often these people start by just questioning the philosophy. At first it seems innocent and the questions are often very intelligent, so it's easy to take the bait. Over time though you start to notice that the purpose of the questioning is not to find answers but to create doubt, something which they will use to slowly try and tear everything down. They seem like honest and rational people, friends even, but eventually their maelvolence gets exposed. Thought I should mention them because they are the really bad ones.
  10. Happy Birthday, Betsy!

    Happy birthday! May you have as many more as you like!
  11. This is a question i've been pondering for a while. To understand whre i'm coming from I think I should give you a bit of background first, but i'll try to keep it brief. As far as romance goes I have never had much fortune. When I was younger I used to be a fat computer geek and on top of that I have a chronical illness which had an impact on both my social life and my education. Once my health started getting a bit better I felt pretty tired of school so I decided to try and make some money instead and work on a project I was very passionate about. I ended up spending alot of time, money and effort going nowhere(well, I did learn a great deal so I most certainly don't wish to come off as bitter or anything). Eventually I realized the need to move on to better things and I found a new passion. Now the last years I have put alot of effort working on and learning new things and just recently this got me accepted to a school I applied for. So all of a sudden(I really did not expect this to happen) I find myself in a pretty good place. It's like after many years of trying and failing I have gotten myself on the right track, creating a really great opportunity for me. During several years I havent even seriously considered finding romance. I have just been too focused on other things. Now on the other hand certain events in my life has made me think about seriously pursuing romance. You know, i'm sort of in a situation where i'm quite happy with what I have become as a person and I think i'm on the right track. I like that, but... As i've said I havent really gotten anywhere. At the moment I don't even have my own place to live, and I feel too old for that(nothing I can do right now though, more than wait). Then to be successfull with education and carreer it's going to take a huge amount of work. It's also difficult to predict where it would lead me, whatever way it goes I can't even say for sure if i'm going to stay in this country(probably am for a while atlest, but can't say for sure). I have two years of work booked up and after that it could lead in so many different directions. Of course, part of that is what excites me because there are so many different things I can do. However, i'm also thinking; what have I got to offer and will I just create more problems for myself? Okay, so take this for what it is - I have just tried to summarize it very briefly to give you the general picture. The question istself can of course be looked at in a wider perspective. What i'm trying to figure out is when is it an appropriate moment to actually look for romance? I suppose my situation is not much different to any kid who goes to college, but on the other hand my intentions would be far more serious. So it's a difficult question for me and I would really appreciate any input on this.
  12. Don't worry, I don't find you condescending at all. You are right about my focus drifting towards hopelessness. I did not notice until you pointed it out, but you are right. It happens a lot when I think about these things and I have to constantly "re-frame" my thoughts to see it from a better perspective. However, while the percentage was just made up I do know that the women that interest me are rare and hard to find. That much I can say from experience. But there are two ways I can aproach this. On way is to give in and just find it oh so hopeless. Another way is to do everything I can to improve the chances, knowing that in the end it will have been worth the effort and also knowing that for every "wrong one" I find i'm just geting a little closer to the "right one". Looking at it that way makes it a little more fun too. Regarding potential I think a problem could be just running ahead of events. You know, everything is going great and you realize this could really be something. What's happening and the potential of that is real, but... the problem comes when the mind just skips a few steps of the process. Maybe that's what you would call a fantasy?
  13. I recently watched the movie Gladiator again and I must say I was truly captured by Connie Nielsen's beauty. There's just something about her looks that, to me, just defines "woman".
  14. Someone ought to make a car preservation zone instead.
  15. Now I have thought about this for a little while. I think part of it might just be a vivid imagination. I know I can easily see things far up ahead, and then I start picturing them and planning how I will make things into that image. This may not actually be such a bad thing, if used properly. A problem that arises however is that I make it mean something. In the beginning is just a potential value; it's not something I have and it's not real, but it could be. And if I could make it happen it would just be so great, because then i'll have this and that and all those other things... In my mind I already have them, but then reality comes like a bucket of ice cold water poured over my head. I mean, i'm not there yet, but I understand so clearly what it would mean, so how can I enjoy the process of getting there? In everyday life I deal with this a certain way. In school every day consists of doing one or two specific tasks, and to get the highest grade they must be completed within a limited time frame. Often the tasks are a bit stupid and the time given is rarely enough to do something well. That's something I hate, but it's just something that has to be done. Then sometimes there are more meaningfull tasks. Meaningfull in this case means that they are fun, challenging and good practice/learning for the future. I have noticed that when I deal with such tasks during the day, epsecially when i've had the chance to perform them my way, I can go home feeling quite good about myself. I think all of those elements are important. Whatever I do I must enjoy it right now. I mean, I can't do things I hate and just hope it will get better in the future. It's like doing the same thing over and over again and expect different results. Then it's also important to have a little challenge and to get some sort of reward for doing these things. For example, when I do something good and creative I get the reward of admiring what I have done and dealing with the challenges. Lastly, it must be connected to the big picture. Even if it's just a tiny little step it needs to be relevant for my future goals and dreams. If I don't have that it's like playing World of Warcraft all day long(not that I have ever played it but...). I imagine it can be fun and the system of the game is based on different challenges and rewards, but if you devote your life to it it's not exactly going to lead to happiness(because a game will not take your life forward). So anyway, this is how I try to deal with life in general, and I think this is how it should be(minus the stupid booring things I need to do). This is also something I think could be applied to social situations. Why not break it down to simple, fun and a little challening tasks that could actually lead somewhere. I don't have that many concrete things in mind but I guess it could be anything from finding out what a girls favourite food is to flirting outrageously. The point is to just find a way to deal with the concrete things right in front of you. A problem with love and romance though is that it just means so much. I don't know, I guess it's just that being alone has started to wear on me, maybe i'm just weak but who wants to fight alone and not have anyone to share the glory of victory with? The irony here is that once the light of hope is lit, once you can really see the potential, that's sort of when you loose. Then it just starts to mean too much, and when it does you are going to mess things up - drop the ball, and it's over. Atleast I think I have identified the problem and started to see a sollution, but... while I have an idea of what to do, I don't know how I can get myself to want to do it. I just can't see myself enjoying for example picking up and dating a lot of different women. I'm not interested in, say, 99,9% of the women out there. And, understanding so well what they are not... finding the right one just seems like a daunting task instead of something fun and exciting. It's a bit stupid really because I know that if I just took the initial steps and got to enjoy it i'd get good at it in no time.
  16. I was counting on her to wait a little bit with her response, but then I thought her response was starting to get a little too late and... well, only way to know is to ask so I sent her a message at work(where I can be sure she recieves them). She told me she had been too busy too respond and that she did not want to hurt my feelings but she could not do it, "you know lunch and all the fun". What can I say? I told her a little half jokingly that "Oh, you just broke my heart, by i'll survive"(although true the point was "who cares?"), and "not much I can do if you don't like lunch and having fun(unless you like bad dinner). It may sound a little unfriendlier than it actually was, but anyway... Game over. I'd better leave it at that and start getting my head fixed...
  17. Best one I have ever met. Apparently though she barely found it worth even responding, let alone spending a little time with me. I must be more clueless than I thought...
  18. I don't know if it's a good thing but, I think I would like Dominique, and Kira... how come noone ever mentions Kira? I'm exactly the way you describe. In this case I havent even recieved an answer yet, but my mind is already a couple of dates ahead. That is until I read some of the posts here, so now i'm having doubts and don't no wether to feel hopefull or hopeless. The impresion that she's not real to me is not entierly correct. My biggest problem right now is that I don't know how far I can trust my judgement. That's perhaps why i've given you the impression that I don't know her. I see it as a big puzzle where I have a lot of pieces in place, but there are some pieces missing that could change the picture. Some pieces I don't know if they are real or just in my head. But I want to make it clear that I do know a lot about her and that there are real, solid, facts to support my vision of her. I may have rushed into things too quickly, but i'm not chasing a ghost. Unfortunately though, because i've rushed myself into it the emotional investment is huge. Anyway, i'm trying to be carefull not to say too much before I know her answer. If she answers "yes" then I think everything will be crystal clear. I'm really hoping that's going to be her answer, not just because it would be great going out with her for lunch but also because soooo many things would start making sense to me. On the other hand, if she answers "no" then i'll be clueless again...
  19. This actually reminds me of a guy I once had the chance to observe, who was really good with women(and not like a "player" or anything like that). What he did was to just have a very casual conversation, making "small talk"(although he was a rather quiet type, so he actually did not talk very much at all) and asking questions just to get to know the person a little better. Very simple, but as you say this is a very good aproach. But there was one thing that really set him apart from others. He would always respond with a concrete observation about the person he was talking to. For exaple a conversation could go like: "So, what did you do during the weekend?" "I just went out with my friends; dancing, having fun..." "Oh, so you're a party-girl then?" Or maybe if she answered that she was skydiving and base jumping he would make the obvious remark that she must be the adventurous type. What i've found most people do is to just comment on the activity; "dancing sounds like fun", "isnt skydiving dangerous?". The conclusions drawn about the person are just overlooked; you just make a quick judgement and keep it somewhere in the back of your head. This guy did not only show interest, he also communiacated; "based of what you told me, this is how I see you". Now imagine how that must be for a good woman with high self-esteem. If you just give a woman a compliment you might be saying that just to be nice. But if you show her, based on the facts she gives you, how fantastic she really is... that's worth a lot more. Ah well, this is just a little something I intend to get better at, and it's so simple really.
  20. Let me see if I got this right... With this lady there are a few things that has been of great value to me. Some things have been a real inspiration, and there are those moments that have mattered a great deal to me. I'm not going into any detail, but you know... there are good reasons why I like her the way I do, and this would make it a little extra disappointing if it were to get to that. The way I understand you now is that whatever happens this can not harm the value itself; the power of those values come from the ideals they represent. In a similar sense if a relationship ends in a bad way it does not destroy the values you got from it. For example the value of romantic love cannot be destroyed because you've experienced it with the wrong person. The vision of that ideal will remain even though you've been "knocking on the wrong door". Is this correct?
  21. Thanks for the great input Styg! I'll coment on that a little later, but let me start with this: After sleeping on it for a while I figured that my thinking is just worried and insecure, like I just can't believe any of it would work. Looking at the facts though I can't see any obvious reason why she would turn me down. Maybe if she's taken already(I never bothered to ask) or if she's just interested in friendship and don't want to give the wrong idea. The latter can perhaps be solved, but the former is more difficult(although not impossible I suppose). Still, the only way I will ever know is if I go for it. So thats what I did. I wrote her a message that would translate to something like: "Remember when we talked last time and I told you I want you to come over to see me? As usual you were being a little difficult/hard to get(stop that ), but you know I was serious. I want you to come over and have lunch with me this week. It's been a long time ago since last time we had that, and i'm not that far away. We can meet up at [location] and go to a place where I usually eat. It's nothing fancy or glamourus but the food is usually pretty good, and the most important thing is to just have a good time. Besides it could be the best lunch you ever had. Just make sure you have a little extra time, and if you're interested I can show you a little bit of what i'm doing here. How about thursday?" Well, I don't know how she's going to take it but i'll know soon enough. My bet is that she's going to take 2-3 days to respond and then come up with some lame excuse(probably just to test me). If she say's "yes" right away then i'll know she wants me. If she tells me it will never work because she just wants to be friends, then I suppose all I can say is; "I don't, I wan't you". If she tells me she's already taken, all I can say is i'm sorry because it would be my fault she chose the wrong guy. Anyway, that's what i'm thinking right now. I'll see what happens.
  22. I'm sorry I havent replied here in a long time. Things have just been crazy and when i've had the time to think I have just been too tired... not that i'm complaining, but I do wish I could write here more often. Anyway, I just met her a few days ago and now I have way too many things to think about again... Well, that's true. It's just that until recently I could only contact her at work, which i'm not that confortable with. Anyway, as I mentioned earlier I was over at my old job and met her a few days ago... I better tell how that went. Remembering how it was before I quit the job I was not expecting much, but when I got there... I think this lady has missed me A LOT(unless she was just trying to hug me to death ). Of course there could be many reasons for that, but atleast I can be sure we are OK. As usual when I talk to her I tend to forget those important things I was going to say. We talked mostly about school and work, but I think I managed to make a couple of thigs clear. The message I was trying to get across was something like; "I want you with me, you should come over to where i'm at", to which she replied; "Maybe I will, you never know...". Whatever that means. When I left she seemed to be expecting something more, but I could not come up with anything good to say so I let it be. We just agreed to keep in touch. So where to take it from there? I figured I would just try to send her an obvious flirt; sent her a friend request on facebook, making it clear that "friends" would be "just to begin with". I think I made my intentions clear, and she accepted that so... atleast she should know what I want. Anyway... right now i'm thinking if I should either just go straight for it or try to play the Atlas-card first. Either I could tell her something like; "Hey, come over and have lunch with me next week. We can meet up at [location] and i'll take you to a place nearby - the food there is pretty good, and either way it's going to be fun and i'll make it the best lunch you ever had. Does wednsday work for you?". Maybe a bit too cocky but I don't want to ask too nicely either. Or I could try; "I was just reading one of my favourite books again and I kept thinking how this main character reminds me of you...". I don't know which is the best way to go. Trying to get her out again is a bit of a gamble, it's great if it works and pretty bad if it fails. With Atlas i'm not sure I can get her to read it. Even if she gets interested she's a busy woman with a lot of other books to read(I know because I once helped her carry what would amount to a small library). Ah, these difficult questions in life. I think I need to sleep a bit on this one, but better make up my mind soon. Any ideas and suggestions would be appreciated.
  23. For the past two years or so I have been working on an old "hobby" of mine, which is computer graphics(mostly 3D). In the past this has been something that I have always sort of returned to, but I never really got anywhere. This time though it was a bit different, it's like I finally got my head around things and began to see some development. Since then I just got deeper and deeper into it, until I decided i'm going to try and build a career on this. And instead of just learning everything by myself I decided to apply for an education. I never had much hope that the school would accept me. It's not that I had poor self-esteem, just that I did not actually meet their admittance criteria plus that I did not think my skills would be good enough yet. Still I decided to do the best work I could, and keep doing so until I passed. So I poured all my energy into it, sent in the application and just started working on the next one when all of a sudden I get a phone call telling me I got in... I mean, just like that my world turns upside down and I realize I have made very thurough plans for everything except this. Well, I can't complain(actually i'm thrilled) but what it means is that I really need to think things through to make the best of this. During the time I worked on my application I really got the chance to better understand what it is that I want. The whole CG industry is very fun and exciting and there are so many different things you can do. I really like all of that, I would enjoy working with it, but it's really not what drives me. What I want to do is to have my ideas and my visions made into works of art, just for the pleasure it brings me. I also love the whole process of it, the way everything needs to be studied and understood from general ideas to the smallest details. When I work I want to really take my time to just think, and I don't want to care if it takes me an hour, a month or ten years. I do it for deep personal values and nothing else. I suppose the "problem" is making money. To do that I think I need to focus on something I want to work with and aim for that goal. The competition will be very tough so I better have a good plan right from the start. There are a lot of different things I could work with, like computer games, film, comercials etc. and all of them could be fun in their own way. I can also learn a lot that will help with my main purpose. But how do I make the best choice and set up good goals? What questions should I consider? It's a bit of a difficult situation because there's this thing I need to do, but the financial reward is probably going to be very modest, and then there are a lot of fun and exciting things I could do if I just focus on them - things that could be very financially rewarding. Not that i'm complaining, but i'm not sure how I should think about this...
  24. Study Problems

    In sports psychology I believe this is called being in "the zone". This "zone" is what you reach when you let your subconcious take over. In a lot of these situations our concious mind is a limitation in that it just simply does not have the capacity to handle the situation directly. When you are, for example, playing soccer it's not a good time to be conciously thinking about how you should kick the ball. It's too complex and it goes too fast. Many times though this is exactly what we do, but in more subtle ways, and that's when it starts to go wrong. What we do want instead is to program our subconcious to have the right routines to handle those situations, so that when we play soccer our mind focuses on what we want done and the subconcious just responds by doing what we have programed it to do. Think about those times you have made some real "lucky shots". Maybe you have decided to take a shot from a very difficult angle, you go for it and all you do is just lock your eyes on the target and sort of tell yourself that that's where you want the ball. It's a simple command and your body just obeys to the simple routine that your subconcious gives it; a routine you have probably practiced a million times. Giving concious and detailed instructions would probably make you fail every time, but with the right routine you can pull off really amazing things. When you are "in the zone" your mind is in a state where it can process a lot of information, that's why it seems like time slows down and all your senses seem heightened - your mind has time to be aware of so many more things in this state. I personally think it's a truly sensational experience, because you feel so in control of everything. This can be practiced and applied more consistently, although I have no good idea on how to apply it to studies. Normally I think it's done by visualization techniques, building the right asociations etc. and, more importantly, finding a good, relaxed, state of mind when doing these tasks. Personally I have this silly little thing where I think of a person who reminds me of extreme discipline, and while I do that I clean my desk and arrange everything before I decide that i'm all set to focus on whatever it is i'm going to do. I think it works pretty well, if I could just clean my desk a little more often.... Anyway, I think it can be a good idea to work when you are in the right mindset and find little things that can trigger that.