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Lady Brin

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I wanted to let everyone know some very sad news, and to recognize someone from this forum who affected me personally during the time I knew her. Lady Brin passed away recently, from cancer she was told this year had spread to her brain. I have thought quite a lot about her over the past few days, and thought this post might help to serve the dual purpose of also giving myself some resolution. I can’t claim to have been very close with Brin, and in fact I regret to say that I had stopped corresponding with her regularly by the time she received this news. And afterward, she was online too infrequently for us to reconnect. But we did exchange private messages often on the forum last year, and my impression of her was that she was a very sweet, funny woman; and someone who deserved a lot more time than she had.

I wish I knew more about Brin than I do. Maybe the best statement of her life is something she wrote in her “About Me” section on her Facebook page: “I’ve led a goddamn great life with few regrets because I’ve done it my way.” She listed two quotes from Ayn Rand as her favorites:

The question isn’t who is going to let me; it’s who is going to stop me.

and

The purpose of morality is to teach you, not to suffer and die, but to enjoy yourself and live.

Everyone can tell people things about themselves, but those things may be true or simply what the person telling them wishes were true. But Brin was honestly one of the most spirited women I’ve had the pleasure of knowing, who loved life and didn’t want to spend one moment of it suffering. My first conversation with her was after she posted a thread about abuse she suffered from her mother as a child. But she would not be a victim, she fought her whole life not to let that experience deny her joy. She had a reminder on her desk that said, “My mother didn’t create, she destroyed…and as you can see she was a failure at that.”

One of her loves was her car, which I remember she was ranting to me about while it was being worked on in the shop:

9919_131448016798_549786798_2556818_3952748_n.jpg

It’s funny, she emailed me one day, forwarding a message she sent to the garage. She had pasted the lyrics to the Beach Boys'

and asked, "¿Donde, donde es mi Porsche?" -_-

I could go on, but I’m only trying to recreate some of what I saw in her, for myself, for the benefit of others who talked to her, and for anyone who never got the chance. I want to share an anecdote she told me from her childhood, and keep in mind another of her favorite quotes, from Atlas Shrugged: “To hold an unchanging youth is to reach, at the end, the vision with which one started.” Now, the anecdote in her own words:

BTW, is Bryson a family name? One of the stoic old ladies in the church I attended as a child was named Mrs. Bryson. It’s funny, but I have no idea what her first name was. On the first day of Bible School when I was 10, as the one in charge of our little souls, she asked everyone what they disliked doing. Waving my hand I complained that I hated washing dishes. At the conclusion, she asked what we had learned. Again waving my hand, I said I no longer hated washing dishes. She was so excited as she asked what had happened to change my mind. I replied, “We bought a dishwasher!” -_- I don’t think that was the answer she was hoping to hear.

She never lost that spunk, and lived life as she'd always envisioned it should be lived. I think I knew her well enough to say, Brin died young at heart. And I’ll miss her.

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Bryson,

Thank you for writing this rememberance of Lady Brin as I enjoyed reading it and agree with your assessement of her character. I also enjoyed and valued Lady Brin and the many discussions that she and I had, she will be missed.

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I'm deeply saddened to hear about Lady Brin. Actually, I believe the word is stunned . . . I had no idea she was ill. I, too, enjoyed and looked forward to her posts and our exchanges.

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Thank you, Bryson. I had no idea Lady Brin had cancer. I was thinking just the other day that we hadn't heard from her in quite a while. I loved her fiesty spirit and was glad that some of my poems were loved by her. I will miss her enthusiastic posts about cars and her individually unique spirit. It is hard to believe she is gone.

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I am very sorry to hear this. Lady Brin struck me as a particularly honest and unique individual. I will miss her posts.

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This is indeed stunning. I would never have guessed she was ill -- her irreverent posts were always full of life.

I must join the others in thanking you for your recollections, Bryson. I was very encouraged that someone as fearless, accomplished, and beautiful as she was enjoyed the movies I recommended. She was a very interesting person who won't be forgotten.

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Thanks for sharing your thoughts about Lady Brin, Bryson. I am saddened by her death. I will miss her. I remember having several discussions here with her.

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A Tribute To Lady Brin

Lady Brin, so brave, Lady Brin,

You held well to your spirit, Delight,

And fought better than well through the night.

Forever your image is bright,

Lady Brin so brave, Lady Brin.

We have now but memory of you,

Who danced in our minds with your speech,

When your sun-words so merry broke through

To show us the heights within reach.

The lightness and zest of your mind

Made the best in us better to be,

And never to dark be resigned,

But sing out in gladness to see.

Lady Brin, so brave, Lady Brin,

In your red car racing along,

Conquering space with the wind,

Shifting your quest to a song,

Leaving the past in the dust,

Bursting out free from all sin,

Driving life's love and its lust,

Riding your will to a win!

Lady Brin so brave, Lady Brin!

_____________________________

In loving remembrance, Brian Faulkner

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I was stunned and deeply saddened when I read the title of this thread. The tiny glimpse I had gotten of Lady Brin both on forum and in a couple of quick PMs was of a life-loving spirit. Her all-in love for her 911 is why I used to refer to her as "Lady Vroom!". I'll miss thinking she was out there, somewhere, driving her just refurbished Carerra at who knows what speeds.

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I wanted to let everyone know some very sad news, and to recognize someone from this forum who affected me personally during the time I knew her. Lady Brin passed away recently, from cancer she was told this year had spread to her brain.

Thank you, Bryson, for writing this moving tribute. It left me wishing that I, too, knew more about Lady Brin. We will miss her on the forum. What a kind friend she had in you.

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She never lost that spunk, and lived life as she'd always envisioned it should be lived. I think I knew her well enough to say, Brin died young at heart. And I’ll miss her.
Lady Brin's posts always made me picture someone with great vivacity. I was sorry to hear this news. Thank you for the fitting tribute.

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I've been gone a while; this is sad news to return to. I also corresponded with Brin quite a bit, both on and off THE FORUM. She was quite a woman. We talked a few times about getting together if I ever had a chance to travel to her part of the country, but I never got to do that. I'll miss her.

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Truly sad and shocking news. She was a great person, who died far too young. She's one of those people I'd missed seeing around here. She had a real zest for life, you could tell. RIP, Lady Brin, you will always be remembered fondly.

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I'm glad that others saw Brin in the same way, and thanks to those who appreciated my tribute. I enjoyed looking back at her messages, but they also made me feel intensely what the world lost when she died.   

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Very sad and shocking news. Thank you for your words, bborg.

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I'm saddened by Lady Brin's death.

Thanks, Bryson, for posting your thoughts, and for the great photo, too. I'll remember her.

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Thanks for the fine tribute, Bryson. You sketch as well in words as you with a brush or pen. The anecdotes bring her back for a few minutes and I'm glad for that, but sorry that such time is so short. She made a lot of her life and I'm glad to have been here to read her contributions and to hear what a great spirit she was in her private conversation as she was in her enjoyable and inspiring public posts here.

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I'm very sad too, but she did leave those of us who knew her some wonderful memories of a witty, courageous gal.

Although Brin's time was much too short, she lived intensely so that what is important is not that she is gone, but that she really, really lived.

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I knew Brin from here, and from her posts on Facebook. When I saw her on Facebook, in March 2009, and sent a friend request, I asked her how she was doing, because I remembered from her posts here that she had health issues. She referred to her pain, but said that it wasn't the pain that bothered her most. She was more irritated by mental fog. Her primary attitude toward anything destructive seemed to be impatience, contempt, or (when it would help) humor.

In spite of the obstacles she faced, she was busy living. She was newly married in January. In March, she was listening to physics lectures, and when I told her about the history classes I was taking, said that she'd like to brush up on her history too.

Her husband wrote (on Facebook) that she wished to be remembered as she was, which people seem to do. And judging by my own memory, and by all the replies here, she was a memorable person - leaving a strong impression in just a short while.

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I wanted to let everyone know some very sad news, and to recognize someone from this forum who affected me personally during the time I knew her. Lady Brin passed away recently, from cancer she was told this year had spread to her brain. I have thought quite a lot about her over the past few days, and thought this post might help to serve the dual purpose of also giving myself some resolution. I can’t claim to have been very close with Brin, and in fact I regret to say that I had stopped corresponding with her regularly by the time she received this news. And afterward, she was online too infrequently for us to reconnect. But we did exchange private messages often on the forum last year, and my impression of her was that she was a very sweet, funny woman; and someone who deserved a lot more time than she had.

Bummer! I hate see bright young people taken from the world before their time. I am sure she used her 53 years well, but she should have had more.

R.I.P.

Bob Kolker

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I really liked the poem you dedicated to Lady Brin, Brian; I'm glad you posted it.

I can imagine, Rose, just what you said, that experiencing "mental fog" would be especially distressing to someone like Lady Brin, an individual who, evidently, cherished the use of her mind more than any other kind of activity. Brain cancer must be the worst kind of cancer someone with her degree of mental focus would have to experience.

It's been a long time, of course, since I've read any of her posts. I'd appreciate it someone would refresh me on where in the forum some of her best commentaries are so I can read or re-read them.

I've never met or corresponded with Lady Brin; I wish I had.

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I'd appreciate it someone would refresh me on where in the forum some of her best commentaries are so I can read or re-read them.

Use THE FORUM's "Search" feature.

Put "Lady Brin" in the "Filter by Member Name" box and check "Show results as posts".

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I really liked the poem you dedicated to Lady Brin, Brian; I'm glad you posted it.

I can imagine, Rose, just what you said, that experiencing "mental fog" would be especially distressing to someone like Lady Brin, an individual who, evidently, cherished the use of her mind more than any other kind of activity. Brain cancer must be the worst kind of cancer someone with her degree of mental focus would have to experience.

It's been a long time, of course, since I've read any of her posts. I'd appreciate it someone would refresh me on where in the forum some of her best commentaries are so I can read or re-read them.

I've never met or corresponded with Lady Brin; I wish I had.

Thank you, Jim. I just wanted to keep some sense of her forever living.

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